I'd have you turn in your Bibles this evening to Paul's letter to the Ephesians, picking up our study in chapter 5. I wrestled long and hard with how to present this beautiful and complex text, even after submitting the outline for printing. And I thought about presenting two or three sermons on portions of this text, but opted for one message, even if it needed to be spread out in order to preserve the wondrous unity that stands before us. And as a result, I have two changes for you to note in your outline. First, that the third point has been absorbed into the first. And second, we're only going to deal with the first point tonight. This text had a way of growing. This text is a part of a larger section It runs from chapter 5, verse 15, through chapter 6, verse 9. Paul's final installation on what is to characterize the Christian life. A life worthy of the calling you have received. And as we considered last time, we are called to a life of prudence. That first is marked by obedience to the revealed will of God in His Word. And secondly, that is controlled by the Spirit. And the Spirit-filled life of the Church is expressed in many ways. as we saw in verses 19 through 21, the last of which Paul mentions is that of submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. And then beginning in verse 22, the Apostle addresses how this mutual submission is to be worked out within Christian households in the God-ordained relationships of wives and husbands, children and parents, and slaves and masters. And these instructions have come to be known is what are called household codes. And they're echoed by Paul in Colossians chapter 3 and Peter in 1 Peter chapters 2 and 3. And such household codes were familiar to both Greeks and Jews and represented the application of state and religious laws to the family. The foundational institution of every culture. As goes the family, so goes the nation. As goes the family. So goes the church. And all of us live by household codes. We all have one. Maybe we inherit it from our parents. Maybe we borrowed it from an expert on the family or we just absorbed it from our culture. But in any case, we know how things are supposed to run in our house. And sometimes these codes are written, like the chart on our refrigerator that tells me who to get after when the dishwasher isn't empty. And sometimes it's me. But most of our codes are unwritten and subject to change with the mood of whoever's in authority. Now, most of us are comfortable with our imperfect and changing codes. In fact, we're so comfortable that we're often not willing to have them challenged or changed by the Word of God. But if we consider that we have inherited these codes from our Heavenly Father, who just happens to be the expert on the family that he created, and the one who establishes every authority, how can we choose to ignore them? Well, I can think of two common reasons. First, because those who most abuse them seem to be the same ones who quote them all the time. And if you've experienced their abuse, you may be prone to respond to these codes with anger rather than joy. and tempted to neglect their application rather than gratefully obey. You ought to be encouraged to know that they are not only addressed to those under authority, but also addressed to those in authority and with particular emphasis. Now, even if you haven't been soured against these codes by their misuse, there is a second and more fundamental reason we might choose to ignore them. That's because we are prone to distort these codes by our own sin. Are we not more attentive to the violations of our rights than to the fulfilling of our responsibilities? Indeed we are. We are quick to focus on the speck of sawdust in our brother's eye and ignore the plank in our own. We are prone to justify our own sin by what we consider the sins of another. You know the refrain. I'll show him respect when he shows me love. And I'll show her some love when she shows me some respect. To cling to these reasons for not heeding to these codes in our households today is to gravely offend our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. These are not simply good advice that we can choose to follow or ignore. They're the Word of God, and they're for us. So may the Holy Spirit open our ears to hear and our eyes to see and our hearts to be changed by this Word. And the first household code that we're going to consider tonight calls for us to live the mystery of marriage. All of us betrothed to Christ, some of us united with a spouse. Let us read together the text from 15 through 33 to hold on to the context and then we will consider from 22 thereafter. Hear the word of God. Be very careful then how you live, not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish but understand what the Lord's will is. Do not get drunk on wine which leads to debauchery. Instead be filled with the Spirit speaking to one another with psalms, hymns and spiritual songs singing and making music in your heart to the Lord always giving thanks to God the Father for everything in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord for the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church his body of which he is the Savior Now as the church submits to Christ so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word and to present her to himself as a radiant church without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it just as Christ does the church, for we are members of his body. For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound mystery. But I'm talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you must also love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. Here ends the reading of God's Word. Our text tonight addresses the most fundamental household relationship, marriage. It can be divided into two main sections. The first is addressed to wives in verses 22 to 24, and the second to husbands in 25 to 32, and together they're summarized in verse 33. but interwoven throughout and tying these sections together, not only in the text, but also in our lives, is what Paul calls in verse 32 the profound mystery of Christ and His church. And it is this mystery which we must begin with tonight. For the better we understand it, the better we can apply it in our lives, and that is exactly Paul's purpose here. Paul opens in verse 22 by addressing wives. But before finishing his thought in verse 24, he draws our attention away from the temporary and earthly relationship of marriage to the eternal and heavenly relationship of Christ and his church. And he does this by presenting the reason that wives ought to submit to their husbands. He says for, in verse 23, begins for, Because the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body of which he is the Savior. Paul draws an analogy between the headship of the husband and the headship of Christ and this comparison is not just something interesting to consider it is a comparison intended to instruct and if we reverse the order and sharpen the language to match the original we can better see the analogy even as Christ is head of the church man is head of the woman and in our text today, Paul strings an argument on this analogy between these two relationships. And this analogy works both ways. The relationship between a husband and a wife helps us understand the relationship between Christ and his church. And the relationship between Christ and his church informs the Christian living between husbands and wives. But throughout our text, Paul repeatedly emphasizes and draws our attention to Christ and his church. For you see, And while not every saint will be married in this life, each and every saint will be married for eternity to Christ. Whether Jew or Gentile, male or female, single or married, all Christians are called to live the mystery of marriage as the betrothed of Christ. And the first thing we learn from this analogy is that the church, the body of Christ, is subject to him. He is the head. And how we understand Christ's headship to the church is essential to our understanding of the relationship of husbands and wives. Some want to limit the meaning of head to that of source, suggesting that Christ is the source of his church, as the headwaters of a river are the source of the river. Now this seems fitting, and when we think of the relationship of Christ and the church as one that resembles our human frame, we see how the head is the source of the body. And this sense is suggested in Ephesians chapter 4 where Paul speaks of the church as growing up into him who is the head. But this limited meaning does not account for all that is meant by head. In fact, the analogy of the human frame alone suggests even more than this. For the body is certainly subject to the head. It is under the head's authority. But there's more. Paul opened this letter in chapter 1, verse 10, with the revelation of God's purpose to bring all things in heaven and on earth together under one head, even Christ. And again in verse 22 of that chapter, it is revealed that God placed all things under Christ's feet and appointed Him to be head over everything for the church. You see, it's clear from these verses that all things have been made subject to Christ and that in a way that they were not before His life and His death, His resurrection and His ascension. They've been made subject to Christ the God-Man whose incarnation we remember during this Christmas time. And clearly His headship is not simply a matter of source. It's also a matter of authority and that authority is His by virtue of all things is being made subject to Him. And that Christ is the authority over His church, His body, is confirmed in verse 24. There the NIV translates the text, now the church submits to Christ. And indeed, that is certainly true enough and describes the relationship between the church and Christ. But it can be misunderstood. What Paul wrote is, the church is subject to Christ. It is a fact. It is accomplished. The church is not subject to Christ because she willingly submits to His authority. She willingly submits to His authority because she is subject to Him. It is her subjection, her position, that determines her submission or her actions. If the church depended on the submission of her members, there would be no church. Consider the Scripture's testimony against the nation-state of Israel. God was a husband to her, and He took her from an obscure and despised position and exalted her to His side as His bride. And yet in her unbelief, she would not and could not submit to Him. So He divorced her, and she is no more. The nation-state of Israel was a visible yet imperfect picture of the invisible and perfect church that continues. And why does the church continue? Because the church is comprised of those whom God has created by His Spirit to be saints, to be subjects to Christ. We're saints because God has made us saints. But we're also sinners. Therefore, we do not always manifest or show our position, our subjection to Christ through submission, obedience to His will. We sin. Even so, we remain His subjects. Even so, we remain His bride. You see, by the Holy Spirit, we already bend the knee to Christ before whom every knee will bow and every tongue will confess that He is Lord. And therefore, we can confess our sins to Him knowing that He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins. and therefore we do not dread our Lord even though we are subject to Him because He is also our Savior. And because we know Him as Savior, we can learn a second thing from this analogy and that is that Christ loves the church. When Paul moves on in verse 25 to address husbands, again he interrupts his thought and draws our attention away from the earthbound and the temporary to the eternal and the heavenly. He says, Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy. Cleansing her by the washing with water through the word and to present her to himself as a radiant church without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish but holy and blameless. In order to more fully appreciate the truth set before us here in these verses, We must have some understanding of the practice of marriage at that time. Our modern marriage practices have certain similarities to be sure, but we would be mistaken to read the text through our experience. Rather, we must consider the marriage ceremonies that Paul knew and his readers knew and let that give us insight to the love of Christ for his church, his bride. And we'll walk through the stages of this marriage that are set forth in this passage and consider how Christ has loved the church. In those times, the marriage began with the betrothal. We think in terms of engagement before the wedding, the time between deciding to get married and actually getting married. And for us, it's a time of promise, but it's a time without really any legal obligation. Betrothal, on the other hand, was much more official and was binding. And it began when both families in the presence of witnesses accepted the terms of the marriage. Then God's blessing was pronounced upon the union, and from that day forward, the bride and the groom were legally husband and wife, even though they did not yet live together. It was during the betrothal of Joseph to Mary that the Holy Spirit conceived Jesus in her womb. And it's clear from Matthew's account in chapter 1, verses 18 and 19, that they were already husband and wife. Listen. This is how the birth of Jesus Christ came about. His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph. But before they came together, she was found to be with child through the Holy Spirit. Because Joseph, her husband, was a righteous man and did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly. You see, betrothal was binding. It had the force of marriage, although not completed. The betrothal of Christ to His church was accomplished before the foundation of the world. The terms of the marriage were set between the Father and the Son in what theologians call the covenant of redemption. A dowry price was set. The Son of God must come into this world, take to Himself human flesh, and then in that flesh to perfectly obey the fullness of the will of His Father even unto death on the cross for the sake of His betrothed. And by this He could merit His bride. And a blessing was promised. The Son of God upon His obedience in the flesh would be exalted above all things and behead over all things for His church, His bride with whom He would reign in glory forever. See, Christ loved church. even before there was a church to love. Now, following the earthly betrothal, there was often an interval of time during which the groom went about earning the dowry to pay for his wife. In a sense, he bought her, but not like buying a car. He bought her by providing the family with a dowry, a security deposit that would provide for her. in the event that he could not or did not provide. In a sense, he would set out for a time to earn or to merit her hand in marriage. And in the fullness of time, at just the right time, the Son of God humbled himself in his incarnation to fulfill the demands of the betrothal. He came to live and to die in perfect obedience to his Father's will. Christ loved the church, Paul says, and He gave Himself up for her. And He did so, according to chapter 5, verse 2, as a fragrant offering and a sacrifice to God. See, by His perfect life and by the shedding of His precious blood, He paid the dowry for His bride, the church. He satisfied His Father's will for each and every one who through true faith knows and trusts that He did so for them. As we sang a few minutes ago, from heaven He came and sought her to be His holy bride. And with His blood He bought her. And for her life He died. And John the Baptist recognized the coming of Jesus Christ as the coming of the husband for the bride. He testified in John chapter 3, I am not the Christ, but I am sent ahead of Him. The bride belongs to the bridegroom. The friend who attends the bridegroom waits and listens for him and is full of joy when he hears the bridegroom's voice. That joy is mine, said John, and it is now complete. He, that is the bridegroom, that is Christ, must increase. I must decrease. Christ loved the church, his bride, enough that he gave his life for her, For you and for me. Well, back again to the earthly. Once the dowry was secured, there was a time of preparation. And during this time, the bride would adorn and prepare herself for the ceremony. And her preparation included a ceremonial bath before being dressed in a wedding gown to be clothed, to be cleansed. Now, it doesn't take much imagination to picture what was involved in these preparations. The particulars have changed with time, but the essentials have remained the same. It's as the prophet Jeremiah asked, does a maiden forget her jewelry or a bride her wedding ornaments? Well, of course not. Many of us have memories of the preparation for our own weddings or for that of our daughters. And there are many arrangements to be made, and many hands are required in order for things to come together. The rings and the flowers, the bridesmaids' dresses and the groomsmen's tuxes, the dresses for mother and for mother-in-law, I could go on and on and on. Suffice it to say that everything must be wonderful but not so wonderful as to distract from the splendor and beauty of the bride. As the betrothed of Christ purchased by His precious blood we are now living in the time of preparation and we are to make ourselves ready. But like earthly brides we have attendance to help us prepare. Our first attendance is the revealed Word of God. The Apostle Paul said of himself to the church in Corinth, I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him. According to Colossians chapter 1, this was the apostolic mission. Paul wrote, we proclaim Christ admonishing and teaching everyone with all wisdom so that they may present so that we may present everyone perfect in Christ. Preparation. But all that we might do and all that the Word of God will do in our preparations is dependent upon our husband. The Lord Jesus Christ. And here the analogy breaks down for us as moderns. In our time the husband is supposed to stay out of the way. And he's not supposed to know what's happening until she appears at the end of the aisle. But in God's economy, in our salvation, our husband is taking care to prepare us for himself. On the one hand, we're responsible to pursue righteousness, living the mystery of marriage through obedience to the revealed will of God. As Paul says, we are God's workmanship created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. On the one hand, we're responsible. And yet, on the other hand, our text makes it clear that Christ Himself is preparing us. Look again at verses 25 and 26. Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the Word. Members of the church, the betrothed of Christ, in a very real sense, we can do nothing to prepare ourselves. But our Bridegroom Jesus Christ, by His ascension, has secured for us His Holy Spirit. And by His Spirit, He attends to us, bathing us and preparing us through His Word for the wedding feast to come. And as a bride is anxious for her wedding, so are we to be anxious for the coming of our Bridegroom. We're to be eager and earnest in our preparations, pursuing the righteousness that has been given us to wear. The righteousness that has been given us to wear. That comes from Revelation 19. That John speaks from the standpoint of the wedding, looking back, and he reveals how fine linen, bright and clean, was given us to wear during this time of preparation. Garments, John says, that represent the righteous acts of the saints. Pursuing righteousness, given us to wear. See, Christ continues to love His church, His bride, through His Spirit who is at work in us even today. Well, the marriage of a husband and a wife was finalized when the bride was fully prepared. The groom would array himself in his best attire and in the company of his friends would proceed with singers and torchbearers to her home. And he would take her on his arm and he would turn and lead her to the home he had prepared for her. and there they would rejoice together in the wedding feast like nothing we've ever experienced. Not uncommonly a week or two of feasting to celebrate this new marriage. Well, when the church, when the betrothed of Christ is made ready, our husband will come and he'll take us to himself. Look again at our text, beginning in verse 25. Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the Word and to present her to Himself as a radiant church without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. Christ, our Husband, loved us and gave Himself up on the cross for our justification. By His Spirit He sanctifies us, cleansing us from every stain and wrinkle and blemish so that He may present us to Himself holy and blameless. And when He has fully prepared us, His betrothed, He will return for us in all of His radiant glory. And His coming will be known to all for He will come with great fanfare to gather us to His side to escort us home to the home He has prepared for us with Him. This will be our glorification. enjoying the presence of our husband for eternity. The Apostle John saw this day and wrote of it in Revelation chapter 19. And this is what he saw. This is what he said. Then I heard what sounded like a great multitude, like the roar of rushing waters and like loud peals of thunder shouting, Hallelujah! For our Lord God Almighty reigns. Let us rejoice and be glad and give Him glory for the wedding of the Lamb has come and his bride has made herself ready. Then the angel said to me, Right, blessed are those who are invited to the wedding supper of the Lamb. Blessed indeed are those who are invited to this wedding supper. For those who are invited are the one and only bride of Christ in the diversity of her members. And you can know that you have been invited when you know and are assured of three things. first that if you were left to yourself you are so offensive to God you would be kicked out of the wedding feast you wouldn't be allowed to stay you wouldn't have the wedding garments as Jesus taught in the parable secondly that Christ the Savior came to live and die not only for others but for you also and therefore you cling only to Him and His perfection to bring you to the wedding feast you hang on to His arm to bring you home and third that you desire to be washed clean by his spirit through the word of God subject to him as your Lord and submitting to his will for all who hold an invitation to this wedding who by grace through faith are betrothed to Christ you are called to live the mystery of marriage you are called to remember and learn from our betrothal to Christ as you do your all to prepare for His coming. You're called to live in reverent submission to His revealed will for you so that your subjection to Him, your head, your Lord, is clearly displayed to the world. You're called to show gratitude for His saving love to you through your selfless love of one another. Live the mystery of marriage for you are the betrothed of Christ. Let us pray. Heavenly Father, we are confronted tonight by this text with a mystery. A mystery that we can know, although we may not comprehend it all. For you have given us the picture of the relationship of Christ to his church in the relationship of a husband to a wife. And in particular, Father, in the wedding that takes place to make them one. Father, we thank you that we are the betrothed of Christ. That from before the foundation of the world you appointed us to be his bride. You set before our husband that which he must do to purchase us. And he willingly accepted and set out in the fullness of time to do it. We thank you, Father, as we approach the celebration of Jesus' birthday, of Christmas. We celebrate the incarnation of the Son of God in the flesh. Because it was in his flesh that he accomplished this for us. In his humanity, he fulfilled all righteousness. And it is in His glorified humanity that we will be united with Him for eternity as His bride. Oh Lord, help us along for the day that our faith will be made sight and that the wedding will be complete and the preparation will be done. Help us, Father, be mindful that during this time we are responsible to prepare and to be found ready when He comes. And yet, Lord, we thank You that it is Your promise to us that by Christ, through His Spirit, we are made ready. We will not miss out on the wedding date. In Christ's name we praise You. Amen.