Turn with me to the book of Proverbs, Proverbs chapter 13, verse 12. It's on page 682 in the Pew Bibles. So Proverbs chapter 13, verse 12. So, hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life. It's so short, we should read it again. Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life. One commentator on the book of Proverbs says that a proverb is in some ways like money. You need to spend it in order for it to be useful. If you have a $20 bill, what can you do with it? It's not much good on its own. Maybe if you're stuck in the woods, you could start a fire with it. But you can't do a lot unless you buy something with it. That's when you really find its usefulness, when you buy something with it. And we can say the same thing with a proverb. Just knowing a proverb isn't really useful. You need to apply them. You need to take them out and spin them, if you will, in a particular situation. Applying it to your life. Using it towards a goal. And that's when you find the real work. Well, as we think of this proverb, how are we going to spend it? How are we going to apply it? And before we get there, I think it's helpful to think of what types of proverbs there are in the book of Proverbs. And we'll look at three here, and that'll help us think about ours. There are some proverbs that are admonitions. They give some sort of explicit direction. A direct call for action. And so Proverbs 26, verse 4, when we looked at last time I preached, it says, do not answer a fool according to his folly, or you will be like him yourself. There's a command there, a call to do something, an admonition. But lest we think any of these commands are absolute, The verse right after it says, Answer, a fool, according to his folly, lest he be wise in his own eyes. Which is it? Do not, or should you answer? When we looked at that, we said it depends on your motivation and also on the fool you're addressing. Well, there's others that are didactic sayings. And these are observations on life. But they're observations on life that even though they don't have an explicit command, it's fairly obvious what you're supposed to do. So we could say Proverbs 20, verse 1. Wine is a mocker, strong drink a brawler, and whoever cannot walk straight because of it will not become wise. The proverb doesn't say, don't abuse alcohol because it'll control you and ruin your life. Instead, what does it do? It describes for us, sets before us, someone who is abusing alcohol. What they're like, what its influence does. And the obvious implication is, you don't want a life like that. And so, don't abuse alcohol. Another example would be, again, from Proverbs 26, whoever sends a message by the hand of a fool cuts off his own feet and drinks violence. Cutting off your own feet and drinking violence, that's usually not something you want to do. And so you obviously don't want to do the other thing. Send a message by the hand of a fool. Don't put your livelihood in the hand of a fool. Well, there's some other Proverbs that are like our text. And they are what we could call experiential sayings. They tell us a truth about the world. But the implications of that truth are a little less clear, less obvious. They require us to think, to meditate it on a bit more. You may agree with what it says, but how you're supposed to spend it, that may elude you. How are you going to apply it? And so our proverb, hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life. If we don't see its nature as this experiential saying, we might say, well, sickness is a bad thing. Can we all agree? Tree of life, does that sound pretty good? I think so. So the proverb means that we should never defer our hopes. We should always fulfill our desires. That'd make a great sermon. I like that. Buy that new car today. You don't want to make your heart sick. Take the trip. Don't wait. Don't delay. It'll be a tree of life to you. Always eat your dessert first. That's just a good principle. Such a message, that doesn't fit. It doesn't fit with the Proverbs, it doesn't fit with the Bible, and even in its immediate context, many say that our passage is in some ways playing off of the passage right before that talks about patience. Look at chapter 13, verse 11, the proverb right before it. It says, Wealth gained hastily will dwindle, but whoever gathers little by little will increase it. We see there a call to patience, a call to persevering through something, and then we get ours that maybe highlights another aspect. Don't wait too long. Don't be too patient in that. So, what we have in Proverbs 13, verse 12, is this observation, we could say, on how humans work. What is true of us? And such knowledge can help us as we live our lives, as we live this Christian life in this world. And in order to look at this, we're going to look at three things. We'll first look at the meaning of this proverb. Then we'll flesh out some applications of it to ourselves and to others. And then we'll look more at its context. And so the first thing is the meaning. And in many ways, this isn't so hard. It's not so hard to grasp. For you kids out there, when you're waiting for something exciting, let's say you're going to your friend's house. Or even better, you're going to Legoland. When you're waiting, does the time go fast or slow? Very slow. It just barely crawls along. Because you want it. That's your hope, your desire. Well, let's say about five minutes before you're supposed to go, your dad comes in and says, Bad news. I just called Legoland. They're closed. We can't go for another month. Would you be disappointed? You might even cry, maybe fall on the ground, do something worse. When we have something that we want, we hope for, and it doesn't come right away, we're disappointed. We're sad, maybe even grumpy. And that sorrow may even affect our health, our eating, other things. And this is true whether the thing is good or bad. In 1 Kings 21, we read about King Ahab. And what did he want? He wanted Naboth's vineyard. And so he went and tried to buy it, and Naboth said, no, I won't sell. And so what did King Ahab do? He wanted it so bad, he went back to his bed and wouldn't get out and wouldn't eat. He let it deteriorate his health. Well, God made us in this way, that when we look forward to something, when we're trying to reach some new goal, when it doesn't come, our whole being can be affected. It can affect our whole being. And that's what this first half of the Proverbs is about. Hope deferred makes the heart sick. What about the second half? Well, let's think of another scenario. So, you kids out there, if your parents, they make you work out in the yard. There's a lot of weeds in the garden or something. And it's a hot day. They make you go out and you have to go pull weeds. But they tell you, if you work for a half an hour, you work hard, then you'll get an ice cream bar. And so you work, you work, and then it comes. The ice cream bar. And you take that bite, and what happens? You smile. Your eyes light up. A smile is on your face. You're joyful, happy. That's what happens when something we've been looking forward to comes. When we reach whatever it is, we have this visual effect on our body. Smile, our posture, other things, they all change. As it is this sign, not of sickness, but its opposite, health, joy within us. And I think that's what we have here, that with the last part, a desire fulfilled is a tree of life. Now notice it says, a tree of life. I think that's important, that it's not the tree of life. It's not speaking, looking back to the Garden of Eden. And we can maybe confirm that if you jump down to verse 14, we find something similar. The teaching of the wise is a fountain of life that one may turn away from the snares of death. Both of these are this general image. Just as we shouldn't go out and try to find the fountain of life that it's referring to, I don't think it's here referring to the tree of life. These are images of well-being, something that gives us health, gives us joy, spurs us on. Well, if we know that, how are we going to apply it? How can we spend this proverb? And I'll make a few applications, mainly on how we act towards ourselves and how we act towards others. But I would say that the basic implication from this proverb is that we need to be careful with hopes and desires. It's not that we should always seek them, but we need to bear in mind how hopes affect our hearts. So as we think of them for ourselves, you might be surprised, but I would argue that the first thing we need to think about is contentment. Now, I'm on Facebook, as many of you are, I'm sure. But I don't really do much on Facebook. I have to admit that my wife created my account. And every once in a while, she logs in and updates my profile picture. And so if I haven't friended you yet, it's not because I don't want to be your friend. It's just because I ignore all my friend requests, except the one from my mother-in-law. I had to take that one. But, but I'm interested in Facebook because there's been studies done on how it makes people's lives, how it makes people more envious, less satisfied with their lives. People log on, they go, they look at the pictures from their friends, and they see them doing all these great things, going on great vacations, parties, they're getting promotions, all these other things. And suddenly, their own lives look boring by comparison. They're more dissatisfied because of Facebook. And I must admit that I've gone on before, and I've looked at the pictures my wife posts of our family vacations, and I think, wow, that looks like fun. And then I'm like, I was there. It wasn't quite that good. Well, our culture, it's very much about indulgence. Treat yourselves. You deserve it. Buy it now. Pay later. We're obsessed with things, and I would say maybe even more so with entertainment, with amusing ourselves. How much fun you can have, that's really the measure of the worth of your life. I don't want to say that fun, that it's a bad thing. No, it's a good thing. Possessions, too, they're a blessing. But they're not the purpose and focus of our lives. They enrich them. But as soon as they become that focus, our lives become hollow and shallow. We can think back to the garden. God didn't put Adam in the garden to party and to play. He put them there to work and to guard. And so this proverb, it's not about seeking pleasures as the end. But it is about seeing how good things are a blessing when rightly pursued. As we take them from the hand of God, we can see how they can encourage us. And in order to do that, one thing we need to do is guard our hopes and desires. We need to do that through contentment. We set our hopes and desires not according to what the world says they should be, not according to what our neighbors are doing, not even what our Facebook friends are posting. Our hopes and desires, they need to align with God's Word, but also they need to align with God's providence in our lives. What good gifts has he given to you? But also, what good gifts has he withheld? We need to learn to be content in his provision. Because you will make your heart sick if your hopes and desires are set on something, even if it is a good thing that God hasn't granted. We can think of Paul, what he learned in Philippians 4, 11-13. I have learned in whatever situation I am in to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. I can do all things through him who strengthens me. I think that is a goal we need, and a way to guard our hopes and desires. But I don't say that, and I want to emphasize again, that's not to remove desires. That isn't the object, to remove all hope and desires. The proverb isn't saying that, that they're bad. Instead, it's saying they're integral to us. They're part of what we are as humans. We need to see our own tendencies, our own patterns of disappointment and joy, and thus learn how to live wisely in this world. And so sometimes we need to encourage ourselves with a desire fulfilled. And to give you an example, I'm on a diet right now. My dress clothes, they started to get a little tight. And I'm much too cheap to buy new ones. So I went on a diet. My frugality controls my waistline. Well, when you go for a diet, you need to find a diet that will work for you. It's got to provide what your body needs. It has to fit your schedule, your wallet. But maybe most importantly, it has to be something that you can stick with, that you'll actually do. So I went and found a diet plan that had a cheat day. This is what the diet says. If you've been able to stick to the diet throughout the week, give yourself a treat once a week. I call this the cheat day. Don't worry about counting carbs or calories for the entire cheat day. This is a great way to give yourself a mental reward, and it also helps reset your weight loss hormones so you can keep burning more calories throughout the week when you're adhering to the diet. Now, I have no idea if any of that's true about the weight loss hormones, but I do know the mental reward is great. When you can look forward to that one day where you can have that piece of cake, maybe even that Peterson's donut, it might get you through the rest of the week. I'll tell you if it actually works, though. So, as we think about this, right, God didn't make us to be ascetics or to be hedonists. But we are called to live in this world, serve him, enjoy the blessings he's given to us, but using, right, using those blessings in a God-honoring way. We don't seek to be miserable. Misery in itself isn't a virtue. But we need to look and use these hopes and desires that they can be this good thing, that they can be this thing to help sustain us in the hardships and the struggles of this life, a tree of life to nourish our hearts so that we may carry on. But the desires and hopes that we should be concerned with aren't only our own. Because often we're in a position to affect somebody else's hopes and desires. The book of Proverbs speaks of this earlier in chapter 3, verses 27 and 28. There it says, Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due. when it is in your power to do it. Do not say to your neighbor, go and come again tomorrow. I will give it when you have it with you. Do you see that? Don't unnecessarily delay the fulfillment of their desire. That is a cruel thing to do. Don't withhold good if you have the power. Don't say, come tomorrow, when you have it today. Now note, it's not saying that we try and give everybody everything they want as much as we can. It's saying, if it's their due, if it's proper, don't withhold it just because we can. And as we think of this, I think there's a special application to parents and their children. When Heidi and I first had kids, one book we read on parenting was Shepherding a Child's Heart by Ted Tripp. And one of the statements he made really struck me, and it made me think. He said at one point, it should be our habit to say yes to a request of our children, unless there are good reasons to say no. It is easy to make authoritarian choices simply out of convenience. It struck me. Now, he didn't tie it with this proverb, but I think it fits the message. As parents, we're in this position of great authority over our children. And we need to treat their hopes, their desires, with care. Now, Ted Tripp wasn't calling us to indulge their every whim, their every wish, give them every new toy that comes along that they want. Elsewhere, he says that we make our children materialist too often by all that we give them when they're young. But what he's trying to get at is that we have to be careful that we're not being selfish in withholding what they desire. We're not saying no without a good reason. No shouldn't be merely some way to enforce our authority or because it's easier for us as parents. He says there'll be plenty of times to say no. We don't have to seek out those. We don't have to seek out times to show them life isn't always fair. They come on their own. Now my kids, I'm sure I'll hear something when I get home. My kids, they'll tell you, I say no plenty. My son learned very early that maybe really meant no. He was very emphatic on that. But this principle really has struck me and stuck with me. So that I do think about it when I say no. And I would tie it also to Ephesians 4. Paul is getting at something similar there where he says, Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger. Do not exasperate them, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. We're not to unnecessarily disappoint our children, deterring their hopes, denying them without good reason. And we could even say, Jesus, he assumes that parents can give good gifts, that they can say yes. And that provides an analogy for our Father in heaven. He says, Matthew 7, verse 11, If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father, who is in heaven, give good things to those who ask him? Now we need to look at context. And so if you still have your Bibles open, make sure you're there in Proverbs chapter 13. Because this proverb, some have argued, and I find it convincing, that it doesn't stand alone here. But it's helpful to read it in context with a few other verses, namely verses 13 through 19 that come after it. And that helps add a new dimension, that that portion has something new that it's teaching us. Really, that wisdom is the way to fulfill desire. And so, we see this in looking first at verse 19. Look down there. A desire fulfilled is sweet to the soul. That should sound similar. Very much similar to what we had. A desire fulfilled is a tree of life. There seems to be a connection that they're trying to make between those two. But verse 19 then has a very odd ending to it. A strange contrast, we could say. But to turn away from evil is an abomination to fools. Why are those two put together? The desire fulfills sweet to the soul, but to turn away from evil is an abomination to fools. And what commentators have suggested is that the verses in between fill this out. That the verses in between, what do they do? Well, they very much contrast what wise wisdom, what wise living leads towards, and then also what folly or wickedness leads to. So let's read them here. Verse 13. Whoever despises the word brings destruction to himself, but he who reveres the commandment will be rewarded. The teaching of the wise is a fountain of life, that one may turn away from the snares of death. Good sense wins favor, but the way of the treacherous is their ruin. In everything the prudent acts with knowledge, but a fool flaunts his folly. A wicked messenger falls into trouble, but a faithful envoy brings healing. Poverty and disgrace come to him who ignores instruction, but whoever heeds reproof is honored. And in those we could say 13, 14, and then 18, they focus very much on the teaching of the wise. Will you hear that? Will you take it in? The wise, the righteous, they do. The wicked, the foolish, they do not. And then 14, 15, and, oh sorry, 15, 16, and 17, they're more on that application. So you apply it, and then how does that affect your life? If you apply it, well, it leads to life. If you do not, it leads to destruction in some way. And so taking that, what's argued about verse 19 is in some ways it's not telling you all the parts that you need to read into it. It's what some have called a disjointed proverb. And these parts, as they contrast, what do we need to assume? Well, verse 19, who is the one who has that desire fulfilled, that's sweet to the soul? Well, in light of the ones that we get before that, we see it's the one who takes instruction, the one who applies it. And then the second half of 19, to turn away from evil is an abomination to fools. Well, then we could ask, what does that lead to? Well, that leads to the opposite of the beginning. That desire is not fulfilled. And the misery that goes with that. And so overall, our passage starts this out. Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life. And the question that it then answers is, how is it that you can have that desire fulfilled? And these following verses answer that. The way of wisdom. Wisdom is what can provide. Wisdom, as we live a life of wisdom, it is this life that leads to the good, to this fulfillment. Now, as soon as we say that, you might question, is it always true? Well, first, before we do that, we get other Proverbs that say similar things. Proverbs 10, verse 24 says, What the wicked dreads will come on him, but the desire of the righteous will be granted. 10 verse 28 says, The hope of the righteous brings joy, but the expectation of the wicked will perish. Proverbs 21, 25 says, The desire of the sluggard kills him, for his hands refuse to labor. And so this is a theme we see elsewhere in Proverbs. The way to fulfill desire is in wisdom. But does it always work? Well, that's what a proverb is. It isn't a promise that this is something 100% guaranteed. But it is the way the life usually works. Or maybe we could even say the way life ought to work. And yet, in Proverbs, even within the book, we see that he has to deal with the effects of sin. And that's brought even more in the other wisdom books in the Old Testament. The book of Job, the book of Ecclesiastes. There we find that, yes, the righteous do suffer sometimes. That the wicked do prosper. And that causes us much grief. But as we think of that, and as we come to a close here, I think we as New Testament Christians, there's another perspective we need to bring to this proverb. And so I'll ask you kids another question. Who is the wisest person in the Bible? This is the good Sunday school answer. Jesus. He himself says that. He says, I'm the one, right, someone wiser than Solomon who's here. Well, did Jesus have his desires, his hope fulfilled? As you think about that, I think one very real way we should say is yes. Because what was his coming desire and hope? It was to save a people for himself. And that is what he did, saving us. But he also had to give up many temporary other desires. And he had to endure suffering, pain, even death on the cross in order to bring it about. And so as I think, as we think about our hopes, as we think about our hearts that are affected by them, We've been speaking about the temporary hopes we have, the temporary desires, which are important. The Bible doesn't downplay that. But we need to continually orient them in light of that ultimate hope we have, that hope of heaven. Jesus' work, it has secured for us that sure hope. But it's in the future. It's something we are still waiting for. Sometimes we get impatient with that. Why hasn't Jesus returned yet? Our hearts can even grow sick because of that. The Bible calls us to wait patiently. Not only are we called to wait, we're even called to suffer. To follow the pattern of our Savior. that oftentimes we have to give up those temporary hopes and desires as we set our eyes on something greater, what he has given to us. And yet, as we think about it, when that ultimate hope comes, it will be so much, so much more than the joy we get from our fleeting desires. It will encourage us not for a moment, but it will be something lasting. It's not a tree of life. What are we looking forward to? It's the tree of life. Our hearts may become sick now for a time, but as we wait for it, what a day that will be when our hope will be fulfilled, when our desire will come. Let us pray. Dear Heavenly Father, We ask that you use these words that you have written, that you have communicated to us, that we take them up, that as we go out in our lives, in this week, in future years, that we use them, that we see that you have given us these words that are for our benefit. And as we do that, we pray that you will encourage us through the blessings that you've given to us. But we pray also, and most importantly, that you continually orient us to your truth, your glorious salvation, your gospel, that we may be reminded each and every week of that, and we may live and act in light of it and out of the joy that we can have in its coming. And prepare us and keep us till that day, we pray. In Jesus' name, amen.