we are turning this morning uh in the bible to the book of the psalms uh i made a big leap if you noticed and i did that on purpose because of the um the baptism this morning the receiving of a new family and i thought it was appropriate to consider together two psalms that deal with uh the home and what the lord has instructed us regarding the home and so we'll consider together home base is kind of psalm 28 but we will consider these uh together since they really are a pair psalm 127 let's give our attention to the word of the lord unless the lord builds the house those who build it labor in vain unless the lord watches over the city the watchman stays awake in vain. It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil, for he gives to his beloved sleep. Behold, children are heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb, a reward, like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them. He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate. And now Psalm 128. Blessed is everyone who fears the Lord, who walks in his ways. You shall eat the fruit of the labor of your hands. You shall be blessed and it shall be well with you. Your wife will be like a fruitful vine within your house. Your children will be like olive shoots around your table. Behold, thus shall the man be blessed who fears the Lord. The Lord bless you from zion may you see the prosperity of jerusalem all the days of your life may you see your children's children peace be upon israel may the lord bless the hearing of his word a few weeks ago we studied psalm 68 and you will remember psalm 68 was a beautiful triumphant psalm of the lord's power and leading his people to the promised land but in the middle of that psalm there was something that really struck me. And I didn't make a big deal of it then. I'm going to do it now. It was the little statement that God sets the solitary in families. In homes. I was moved by that. That in the midst of all of this triumph and war and hardship and affliction and deliverance and power, that the Lord had His eye upon somebody who stood alone and that He desired the place the solitary in a family i was moved by that god loves the structure of the family it's a predominant theme in the wisdom literature of the scriptures and often we see this in the context of the family the biblical writers are giving us a heavenly perspective about the life of man as we look out into the world this is a heavenly perspective we're looking at this morning and often what you see is in the scriptures people described as living for their own pursuits desiring to build in this world build a life build a home everyone having certain dreams and certain aspirations with a relentless drive behind it of finding and pursuing happiness what's happened has that gone well what we have seen in our society in front of us especially in the last 50 years especially is the disintegration of the family the song this morning is is is helpful 128 especially 127 too because it's it's describing for us why these problems occur and what the remedy is and how appropriate as we've welcomed the Persagonas among us, this family, and we've baptized their little ones to think through what the Lord's design is and what delights Him. I love these two psalms because they're teaching us the order of society, the building up of the home. The only way this is maintained in a purposeful and a fruitful manner is by the wonderful blessing of the Lord. The structure of the family is an incredible gift from God. Incredible gift. That He wants us to enjoy and to use to build for His glory. And the psalm is telling us from a heavenly perspective that any attempt to do this without Him is in vain. It's fruitless because of the fall. In verse 1 of Psalm 128, we have described the blessed of this life. Notice what it says. Blessed in Psalm 128, verse 1. Blessed is everyone who fears the Lord, who walks in his ways. Here, the psalm is considering, in context, the structure of the family, and he's speaking in a beautiful poetic way of the blessing that the Lord lavishes upon his servants through the means of the family. Psalm 127 and 128, I've said, are a pair, and they're so intricately tied together. The beauty of this, in looking at them together, is that Psalm 127 is telling us that God alone is the author of the blessings to the family, and psalm 128 tells us how god works through the heads of the home to build the family look at the beginning of 127 unless the lord builds the house those who build it labor in vain remarkable statement he could have had the physical house the temple you'll notice this is of solomon but really we're looking at the domestic order of things we're looking at the government of the family the household that god had originally designed of the family to be the vital foundation of society one that is helpful and a peaceful order that would thrive to the glory of god psalm 127 was written by solomon who understood a lot about this who learned a lot about this made a lot of mistakes along the way and he starts out here unless the lord is building those who are trying to build labor in vain think of the kingdom of god so here we're looking at things from the heavenly perspective that after the fall when we're applying this to the family as he gets to heads of homes and wives and children in these two psalms what we've seen today and what the fall has brought is an incredibly dysfunctional situation for the family in both of these psalms he's describing the head of the household and you'll notice how his leadership his guidance affects the home so in psalm 127 solomon uh begins there and he gives us the consequences, if you will, of what happens to the ungodly man who is trying to build his life and in turn, of course, his family without the Lord. What he's describing is a certain approach to life of a man who lives for his work. He lives for it. Remember what happened at the fall. If you were to go back, what you would read in the curse that the Lord leveled upon the man, remember what the curse was. the curse was that the remember the fall cursed is the ground for your sake both thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you and you shall eat the herb of the field in the sweat of your face you shall eat bread till you return to the ground for out of it you were taken for dust you are and a dust you shall return you ever thought about that that god said there the ground cannot be subdued and that he uses the very same word that he used for the woman in childbearing pain that it would be for the man in painful toil he would work all the days of his life and then god would hit the productivity and curse the productivity there will be thorns and thistle and that's what we've seen throughout history haven't we bad crops and weather problems and a hostile creation often rising up at times to the works of man's hands for survival. And so in the sweat of his face, he is in constant possibility of loss and struggle with the earth to provide because of sin. Now Psalm 127 in wisdom literature in a poetic way is looking at this and it's saying, let me present to you a man who's trying to do this without the Lord let me describe to you what that's like you have man obsessed to dominate something he can't and that quest is so full of conflict and so full of pain he is desperately trying to overcome it and in trying to overcome it he is taking for himself what only belongs to the lord psalm 127 you'll notice that the um the language there of a man who is wearing himself in his work notice that in verse 2 he's up late he rises up early he's up late rises up early this is the pattern of life all about earthly success all about honor and he thinks that by his hard work, by his human ingenuity, he will be prospered. By his work ethic, he will be filled. He's a workaholic. Now here's where the real point of Solomon's wisdom should be understood. Looking at this from God's perspective, all of this hard work has a goal, doesn't it? It has a goal. It has a goal of a kind of autonomous, prosperous life, totally devoid of dependence upon the Lord to bill and what are the consequences of all of this labor under the son of man without the lord what are the consequences of that i think verse 2 is really a remarkable statement about the life of so many under the sun rising up early staying up late to eat the what esv has an interesting translation. The bread of anxious toil. I like that. I think that gets at it. The older translations would say, which I really like, you'll notice what it says, the bread of sorrows. I think of Haggai's day when the people were building their own paneled houses and the house of the Lord was not being built and the lord leveled a kind of curse remember what that curse was you eat but you don't have enough you drink but you're not filled with drink you clothe yourselves but no one's warm and he who earns wages earns wages to put it in a bag with holes In other words, you get all that you want and it goes absolutely nowhere. And then it makes a really, the Psalms make a really big statement that one of the curses that the Lord leveled on that community was that he sent leanness into their hearts. Leanness. All of their work to build life for themselves, without the Lord, it didn't profit. And even when they had, they didn't have. Isn't that the craziest thing, that the people who have the most are never satisfied? That was the curse. Now, Psalm 127 is not just speaking physically. I believe Psalm 127 is looking at the bread of sorrows in the life of the home, in the family, in the children. What becomes of the home? You want to know why society is falling apart? you want to know why things are the way that they are i'm going to say up front it's not a president that creates this it's not a president that everyone moans about today that creates this it's not even really political policy oh i can make it a lot worse we think today that if we have just the right political leaders or we have better economic policies uh you know this is going to deal with all the corruption that we see in in society and so you have many christians giving themselves to try to fix that i'm not saying we shouldn't try to fix that but what i say to people when they approach it there so do you think that's the beginning of a problem or the end of a problem what we're seeing play out before us is not the beginning of a problem it's not that so and so got into office it is that this is the end of a long problem playing now itself out and the consequences coming upon the society of it it's the problem of what david said when he cried out help for the godly man ceases that's the problem how many godly men do you know anymore who you really can listen to and when you listen to it demands respect you listen to them and you you want to respect them in our pursuit this is going to sting a little and stinging is good if it stung me it's going to sting you and it stung me okay in pursuit of the american dream all of this hard work and all of this stress to have a good life what really is the state of things can't we agree with the facts Homes are shambles today. Divorce rates have never been higher. Sexual immorality out of control. Children and people full of clinics, full of overstressed people, new medicines every single day to deal with just the next problem. And this just gets worse and worse and worse. And the family structure, it's totally crumbling. The children in our society are of broken homes. and they're groping around, and they're empty. You see them, they're empty, they're lost. They don't know where they're going. For the first time in history, men or women outnumber men in the workforce. It just happened. One-third, less than one-third of children see a stay-at-home mom. Before 1960, no cohabitation stats. It is so far off the radar, today 60% cohabit before marriage. Marriage is dying altogether. I mean, it's rising up to half of all people even believe it's obsolete. And so half now end in divorce. 41% of children born to single moms out of wedlock. You know the average American father gives his child less than three minutes of undivided attention a day. 21 minutes a week. I'll tell you what's happening in this society. We're eating the bread of sorrow. We're eating the bread of sorrows. And the Lord has punished us with the sad reward of trying to build without Him. It was remarkable when I was reading Calvin on this, and he was strong, and this was the 1500s. He says, you know what we find in the present state of the world? It's so troubled and confused, isn't it? Justice is gone in cities. Now, I remind you, this is 15, what? Justice is gone in cities. Husbands and wives are accusing one another. Fathers and mothers complaining of children, bewailing their condition, and how few are there that turn to the Lord. How few? And God, therefore, justly renders this sad reward to ungrateful man. That's what God does. Now, Psalm 127, you say, well, I don't disagree with it because you can't disagree with what's gone on all around us. How is that reversed? I believe Psalm 128 provides us a really glorious, beautiful perspective. In fact, Martin Luther loved this psalm. And Martin Luther would say, this is one of the most encouraging psalms for you parents and you marriages and your marriages that are going through mass conflict. Notice what happens here, the beauty of what's described under the sun. There is a way that God has dealt with the curse. And that God reverts the curse into blessing. And what do we call that? We call that gospel, don't we? We call it good news. We call that what Christ has accomplished on behalf of us. And you say, how? Well, notice what's described here. This blessing is upon who? You should know in the Psalms by now that this is descriptive. And it's describing the blessedness of those to whom the Lord does not bring upon certain things, just like he would say of David. And there's only one way that comes. This is why our Lord Jesus came. And this is why He was called the builder of the house. And this is why He was the one building the kingdom. And He was the one restoring. And He was the one pouring water on a desert and bringing back life to it. And He was the one raising up living stones. And through His death and resurrection, which we're celebrating at this time of year, there's power to return. And that's the basis for the blessedness that is here described. And that's what makes this so beautiful. He's not saying, just work harder. This is not what he's saying. In fact, that's the problem in Psalm 127. Psalm 128 is describing the blessedness of the man who's received the good news. Who renounces himself. And what happens to a man like this? He's born again. he's given life he's brought out of the darkness he begins to see he's made alive i mean the language is all over the scripture this is tonight roman 6 christ is the treasure christ is the center of existence the life he lives he lives by faith in the son of god and what happens to him he's now being framed by something in response to that out of because of the grace with which he's received he's being framed to god's will and he wants it and so the the blessedness that this psalm describes is one who has come to begin to taste the fear of the lord to reverence him to see that there is the answer there is where life is found He calls upon him. He turns to him. He's devoted to God's glory. You know, this is what the elders have desperately tried to recover. This is what I have seen in the ministry. What are we trying to recover? We're starting with the men and we're trying to recover men in their families who lead, Who gather around the table. Who exalt the Lord. Who worship Him. And will lead their families to do that. It's sad that the reason we're dealing with this is because in most homes there is absolutely no spirituality among the men. And these are church-going people. And the psalm is, I believe, beginning there, but he's speaking of the blessedness through the man that comes upon the whole house. it's beautiful isn't it what begins to happen to the family this is the crucial point of the psalm they don't labor in vain what does God do God blesses the works of his hands the servant delights in the Lord and God makes his work meaningful no matter what it is he gets to do all things for the glory of the Lord whether even he's eating or drinking he's counted all things lost for christ and the hand of the lord's blessing is upon him he sleeps that's a remarkable statement in psalm 127 isn't it he sleeps because god gives him sleep he's received the bread of joy i find this a remarkable contrast here you know you'll notice in verse 2 of Psalm 128 when you eat you shall eat the fruit of the labor of your hands you shall be blessed and it shall be well with you you know this is exactly what our Lord was was was saying to his people all the time he was calming their hearts he was speaking peace to them he was sailing them don't be troubled he was saying i have remember what he said do not lose heart and so he would say what man is there among you if a son asks for bread we'll give him a stone you're worried about so many things he'll provide come to him and i've spoken all these things he said that your joy may be full and your joy may be complete again as calvin said the psalmist is assuring God's believing people that even in this pilgrimage of earthly or earthly place of sojourn, they shall enjoy a happy life. Isn't that just the truth? They shall enjoy a happy life insofar as the state of the world will permit it. I love that. I was exactly right. That is how good he is to give us that in this sad world. The wicked work so hard to be happy without the Lord. And they eat the bread of sorrows. They don't sleep, do they? That's the imagery here. They don't sleep. They're up all hours of the night in anxiousness. Notice in Psalm 127 that the Lord gives that to His sheep. We can lay our heads down to rest knowing that he cares, knowing that he loves. And what happens to the house? I love to think about what begins to happen to the house in this great reversal. This is so beautiful. Notice that he's overturning here. And in verse 3, your wife shall be like a fruitful vine in the very heart of your house. What's he describing? You know one of the greatest blessings that God gives to a man as a wife? she's going to be a fruitful vine. What does that mean? Well, often the Bible speaks of the fruit of the vine with grapes and wine. And I believe he's talking about refreshing enjoyment. Solomon uses it to even describe sexual enjoyment. Wine was that that was used at the end of a long harvest, and everyone knows that a glass of wine, no matter how pious you are, it's true, A glass of wine with dinner is a wonderful blessing. A man enjoys this. And one of the things that the Lord has put into the home to gladden the heart of man as he works under the sun is a wife. Refreshment, who after a hard day's labor, he can come home and in the heart of his house is a good wife who's made that home beautiful. And when that's enjoyed the way that it should be enjoyed, you should look up and say praise god for the wonderful blessing that you've given me you think a man enslaved to his work rising up early and staying up late with little sleep and restlessness enjoys the vine in that house that vine is a hindrance that vine is neglected and what happens to a neglected vine well we uh we kind of chuckle when we read these verses in proverbs but better to dwell in a corner of a housetop than in a house shared with a contentious woman right i don't blame the woman for that i blame the man for that that's not what's being described here there's real joy to come home because the man who is outside of christ doesn't really want to be home He wants to stay away. Think of how blessed you are to have a good wife to come home to, who fills your heart with joy and fills your heart with peace. Who can find a virtuous wife, the scriptures say. Let me tell you how rare this is. Her worth is far more than rubies. The heart of her husband safely trusts her so he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life. That's a blessed man right there. And then it moves on and you move on to verse 3 and it discusses children, doesn't it? Your children are like olive shoots around your table. I love that imagery. Isn't that neat? Olive shoots. To the Jews, the olive plants were the most valued commodities of daily life. And here he just heaps up the blessing, doesn't he? A whole quiver full of children, not only made in God's image, God giving us the blessing of training them to know him. Contrast what society does who's eating the bread of sorrows to children. You want to know what our society does to children? Eating the bread of sorrows, it puts a knife in a womb and kills them. And we should feel the pain of that. And the Lord is saying, I want you to know that one of the greatest blessings that I am blessing you with is children. The more we think of children in this way, the more we see them as a precious gift from the Lord, the more we nurture them, the more we'll care to love them, the more we'll care to cultivate them and train them to know the one who has loved us. Meet the blessed home. Behold, verse 4, Thus shall the man be blessed who fears the lord this will be the characteristic of the home where the lord is feared now you say that's wonderful but i often don't get to experience that you know i know struggle in my home listen there are times my wife has said don't quote to me that my children are olive shoots around the table there are times when she says don't quote proverbs 31 to me because i don't feel it at all don't tell me that but those are the bad moments you know an olive tree has an extremely slow growth process i find this really fascinating it doesn't produce fruit until 15 years and olive orchards and are full of trees of all sorts of different sizes, it takes 40 years for the olive tree to finally mature. Now I just say that because I think that would be an encouragement to you who have children who you're struggling. The picking of fruit is rigorous. One of the things that we have to remember is that the growth of the family is slow and it's not very glorious at times. The psalm is not saying that we'll never face difficulties. The Bible is saying this is the general rule of things that you get to enjoy. And who here is about to deny that as a believer? How many times have we quoted, train up a child in the way that he should go and when he's old, he'll not depart from it. That is not an automatic, but that is the general rule. And the general rule is when the Lord has blessed a home and a father is given to love the Lord and serve the Lord and make his worship a priority and a father actually leads in the home and he doesn't put other things before that, you know that home, there's going to be fruit in that home. It's a well-watered garden. Just like I can say that when a man loves his wife, even how amazing it is that the Lord would say, love your wife as Christ loved the church, that he would call us to do that. Do you know what happens to the wife? He says there's a consequence to that. The wife is sanctified by that love. It actually has a purifying influence on her and her sanctification, and she'll become the fruitful vine in the home. She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness. She watches over the ways of her household and doesn't eat the bread of idleness. Her children, rise up and call her blessed. Her husband also, and he praises her. The fact is this morning, to be honest, and starting right here, I'll be the first to say that I've not feared the Lord the way that I should. I'll be the first to say there's been a lot of laziness in the home. And you know the Lord wants us to confess that. He wants us to come to Him and tell Him that. And to ask Him for strength. And to ask Him that the priority of the heart would be Him. Because there are consequences to neglect. I'm thankful for grace, but we all know sin brings consequences. Children value what the parents value. If you have a father that doesn't value the Lord and the home is not in order and the father does not value his worship, why do you expect the children to? It's a general rule. If the church is not valued, if these things aren't valued, that's what's being taught. And I think Calvin's correct, and this is where the sting comes, that if you have, he says, a wife that is a termagant. I've never heard that word in my life. Or your children are vagabonds. Many of these struggles happen from our own. fault but you see there's a reason luther would look at this psalm and say this is god's answer this is his gospel in christ there is a way of return and this is a comfort for those said luther who experience the crosses of married life the lord is extremely merciful and long-suffering and always he wants you to come and trust His promises and childlike faith. And grace does overturn. Grace does overturn. And I tell you, the greatest thing a wayward child can witness is a real change in the life of the parent. Let them see it. Showing what the gospel belief and what Christ has really done. Our families, I said earlier, tell a story. We're telling the story of the Christian gospel. Husbands loving wives as Christ loved the church. Wives submitting to husbands as to the Lord as the church submits to the Lord. Children obeying their parents in the Lord for this is right. And I think these psalms are a wonderful encouragement to parents. That the Lord is teaching us something too beyond this in all of our discussions about kingdoms and conflict and all that going on today. He's telling us that fundamentally the way society is altered is this way i love to see this it's telling us how society is affected it's not ultimately through political agendas as important as they are but through the power of the gospel transforming people and you know where it's going to start it's going to start right with you at your kitchen table the lord blessed you out of zion notice this language and i'll close with this May you see the good of Jerusalem all the days of your life. Yes, may you see your children's children. You know, the Lord delights to do that. Abraham saw that. Peace be upon Israel. That's the Lord's desire. That's what he desires for us. That's what he gives in his blessing. The promise of the Abrahamic covenant is that in him, All the families of the earth would be what? Blessed. This is why God set aside a seed. And this is why Christ came, to raise up a family. And all of those families on the earth coming together, that they would be a blessing to the ends of the earth. I'm going to confess something else this morning. I guess I'm in a confessing mood. I struggled with leaving Linden because I thought, what a perfect community. I was worried about what I thought everyone did here, pee on walls, it's called graffiti. I was worried about that. I was worried about what my family would be exposed to. Shame on me. I was reading a study, and James Boyce quoted it, and I thought it was so helpful. If 1% of evangelical Christians living out in the suburbs had the faith to move back into the city, Christians would fundamentally alter the history of urban America. Wow. Imagine this. Imagine this. A city full of people who weren't running out to the suburbs to build the white picket fences, but were here, had God-fearing husbands in the city, wives showing gentle and quiet spirits children honoring authority parents who love and not divorce building a kingdom as they come together to worship the Lord and enjoy Him that's a well watered garden that this world won't see hasn't seen and that's going to be one of our greatest avenues of witness in the future and that's why I picked this today with the Persegona baptism. This is going to be one of our strongest areas of witness in a lost and dying world, to see people committed to stick through it in the hardship and couples standing up and celebrating 65 years together. Let us never forget Christ is the builder of our homes. Christ is the builder of his kingdom. For unless the Lord builds the house, everything you're doing is in vain. Bless us, everyone who fears the Lord. May this peace be upon us, our children and our children's children forever. Amen. O Lord, our God, thank you for the family and thank you for your powerful gospel that shatters through and breaks the awful consequences of the curse and renews us that we might love and that we might be to you thanksgiving offerings of praise. May our families reflect. Forgive us that our priorities often are so wrong. Forgive us that as fathers we've not led the way that we should. Forgive us as mothers that we have not nurtured and cared and showed the kind of submissive spirit that you desire. Forgive us as children for not obeying the way that we should. And restore to us. And let your blessing fall all because of your Son, who is the builder of the house. In Jesus' name we pray. Amen.